You may have noticed how often this site deals with the subject of relationships. We so readily cover this topic because relationships are vitally important to us as human beings. Interpersonal relationships [with others] are the heart and soul of human the experience. Our ultimate relationship is with the God. The next relationship in line is usually with our spouses ( or soon-to-be).
We optimistically picture the institution of marriage as being synonymous with love, commitment, and perfect bliss. But often that is not the story. marriage takes lots of hits i.e. finances, incompatibility, and of course the infamous extramarital affair. For some, adultery damages a marriage seemingly beyond repair. But for others, they appear to buckle down and stay in the relationship for the long haul. This is especially noticeable among wives who are victims of an infidelity. People find it hard to understand why a woman would choose to stay in a marriage/relationship with a man who has cheated on her, or who has a history of extramarital affairs but millions do
If you think extramarital affairs are relegated only to the secular world, you are sadly mistaken. Incidences of adultery are very much existent among church-goers, but perhaps not as well-documented which gives the couple a chance to privately work out their differences. But the more well-noted cases like, still-pastoring and nationally known T.V. minister, Pastor Jamal Bryant, leaves one scratching their heads. Pastor Bryant's history of infidelity is said to date back well before he and Gizelle Bryant were married which resulted in several children born before his marriage; of which one was was conceived with a 17 year old girl. He gives no excuse for his behavior except to say "He has a problem with his flesh". His wife filed for divorce in 2008, then again in 2009 (Maryland Judiciary case). But last month, footage was videotaped of Pastor Bryant welcoming his wife back into the church, and placed on youtube. Was it love or maybe low self esteem that propelled her back into the marriage? How many of you out there could relate to, and would do the same thing as, Gizelle Bryant?
Laura Trice, M.D. believes one reason is that Women tend to be very self-critical and are easily guilted into feeling responsible for the affair. Most women are naturally nurturers and tend to over-mother men. They accept excuses from, and make excuses for, the husbands' infidelity.
Another reason, she says, is that some women feels being with a man makes them feel safer in the world.
Within the church, I believe the mere fact that God says he "Hates divorce" is enough of a reason for some couples to try and work things through. For others, "forgiveness" is a way of life and applies to all offenses. Even adultery.
